


For Once We Have Time

by delinquentprincess



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bellamy is done holding back, Bellarke, Clarke makes it up to space with them, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Post S4, Post-Canon, things are sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-05
Updated: 2017-11-05
Packaged: 2019-01-29 17:16:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12635559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delinquentprincess/pseuds/delinquentprincess
Summary: Clarke reflects on all of those she's lost, Bellamy makes sure she realizes she hasn't lost him.Or Clarke makes it to the rocket on time and goes back to space with the rest of them and Bellamy is done holding back his feelings.





	For Once We Have Time

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this instead of working on my dozens of WIPs. Also theres not enough fics where Clarke goes to space with them so I wrote one. Enjoy!

“Loving any of us is a death sentence, isn’t it?”

Bellamy startled and looked over his shoulder at Clarke, who was staring at a chart on one of the many screens that dominated the wall in the Earth Monitoring Station. She had her arms crossed and it seemed her focus wasn’t really on the radiation levels of earth. 

It had been 5 months of them living on the ring. 5 months since Praimfaya. 5 months since Clarke barely made it back to the rocket in time and Bellamy almost had to leave her behind. 5 months of living in peace. 

They had been working in silence so far, enjoying each others company. Enjoying that the other was _alive_. Clarke’s question took him off guard. She didn’t like to dwell on the dead.

“Wells, Finn, Lexa, Lincoln, my dad, Maya, Gina, Sinclair, your mother, _Jasper_.” Bellamy’s eyebrows furrowed. 

“Emori loves Murphy, and she’s still here.” Bellamy regretted it as soon as it left his mouth.

“I tried to kill her Bellamy.” It came out flat and uninterested.

“What about Kane? He loves your mother.”

Clarke turned to face him, “And he would have died if I had gotten my way and kept the bunker door closed.”

“I’m still here.” His tone softened as he tried one more time. 

The hidden meaning in his confession hit Clarke in full force as he watched her eyes widen just the slightest. They always knew in an unspoken way how they felt about one another. They always knew that they could never be more than what they were though. Not with everyone counting on them. Not with the world going to shit. But now, up in space; alone, together for five years? What was stopping them?

Bellamy could see the inner turmoil as she fought with herself, the same as he saw when they were making that list on who of Skaikru would survive Praimfaya. She bit the insides of her cheeks and turned her gaze downwards as tears leaked out of her eyes. She was ashamed, Bellamy realized. 

“Bellamy, I almost _shot_ you.” It came out watery and she crumbled before him, “The only reason I didn’t is because I’d rather let our people die than loose you.”

He crossed the room and wrapped his arms around her, he was done with being hesitant. Her arms snaked around him, and she squeezed him tight. Holding her close, he murmured out words he’d been wanting to say since Mount Weather, “Clarke, you aren’t going to lose me.”

“How can you be so sure?” It was muffled against his t-shirt.

“Because we have 5 years alone in space,” now or never, “and because I love you.”

She froze against him. _Love._ They had never spoken it out loud. They had danced around it for a whole year, hinted at it, even entertained the idea at one point around a fire while drunk. But never, had either one of them said it out loud. And there was a reason.

Clare was suddenly pushing away from him and out of his arms, “No, no, you can’t say that out loud! Saying it out loud means you die! Everyone who loves me dies!” She’s hysterical and Bellamy began to panic. He grabbed the sides of her face, forcing her to look at him, to stop her from getting too far away. She clutched onto his wrists, her face contorted. 

“Clarke, Clarke, stop!” He rubbed his thumbs against her temples, trying to sooth her, “I’m not going anywhere, princess, you’re stuck with me.” He gave her a half smile. 

Clarke still looked in pain. He tugged her foreword until she was against him and placed a kiss firmly to her forehead. Her eyes fluttered closed and she sniffled. After what seemed like an eternity of silence, she squeezed his wrists and without opening her eyes whispered,

“My dad died a year ago today.” _So that was what brought this on._ Bellamy always knew that at some point Clarke would break. With all the death and suffering she’d seen it was a miracle she held herself together while the world was ending, Bellamy knew he almost lost it on more than one occasion. He knew it was coming, but that didn’t mean it made this any easier. 

“That wasn’t your fault Clarke,” When she tried to open her mouth to protest he reiterated, “it wasn’t your fault, and neither was Wells, Finn, or Lexa. _None_ of them were your fault.” He watched her consider this before weakly nodding and laying her head against his shoulder. He knew she didn’t actually believe him, but for now, he’d take what he could get. 

They stood in silence and Bellamy began to think he had been wrong in the way Clarke felt about him. Heat began to crawl its way up his neck and he became embarrassed, but Clarke wasn’t making any move to let him go, so he wouldn’t either. His fears were put to rest as he felt Clarke’s nose nuzzle his throat, and her lips press against his collar bone.

“I wanted to be the first to say it,” He didn’t have to ask her what she meant, “I _was_ going to be the first to say it. I was going to tell you when I got you back from Roan, when we were making the list, when we were in the lab. But none of them seemed like the right time. Then again when is the right time for anything at the end of the world.” She huffed a laugh, “the last time I was going to say it was when you were going to help Murphy carry Monty back. But I didn’t because I knew that if I told you, you would have never let me go to that tower by myself and Monty would probably be dead.” 

Bellamy couldn’t help the grin from forming on his face. He wanted to be the first one to say it. He wanted to tell her when he got her back from the City of Light, when they were making the list, when they were bringing the hydra-zine to Raven, when she got back to the rocket. But he knew as well as she did that they had responsibilities to their people and they couldn’t let anything get in the way. Now, they had 5 years to worry about their responsibilities. For once, _they had time._

When the amount of time they had hit Bellamy, he felt happier than he had in years. He had all the time in the world to love Clarke Griffin without interruption. Lifting her up from her position against him, he spun them around until she was giggling (he had never heard her giggle before and he realized he wanted to spend the rest of his life making her giggle). There was no big build up to their first kiss. Bellamy peppered her face with kisses until he finally landed on her lips and silenced the giggling that he loved so much. She made a squeak as he finally did, and she melted against him. 

“I love you” Bellamy smiled as they broke apart.

“I love you too, you dork” Clarke laughed.

Their heads whipped around as clapping came from behind them. There, standing in the doorway was Raven and Monty.

“Well its about damn time.” Raven said as she returned her hands to her hips. 

Upon looking at Monty, Clarke became concerned, “Monty, what’s wrong?”

He smiled at them and shook his head, “It’s nothing, I just owe Jasper a bag of weed.”

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback would be appreciated!


End file.
